ONE WOMAN’S INSPIRING BATTLE – against an age-old social evil

By K S Shankar

This woman in her fifties has resolutely battled a centuries-old social evil that to this very day subjects’ tens of millions of women across India to a life of indignity, injustice, ridicule, insults and denial of basic human rights. As a 23-year- old who lived in Mandi, Himachal Pradesh during the late 1980s, Nirmal looked forward to a quiet, contented family life with husband. That was when destiny intervened to alter the script of her life. In 1989, when her life partner died of a heart attack at age 30, she became a vidhwa, or widow. Suddenly, her life had turned upside down.

For a year, she was made to live in a dimly lit room without even a fan. No longer could she do anything that resembled a regular life. In 1994, ahead of her brother’s wedding, Nirmal purchased the groom’s dress with her money. While her brother happily wore the wedding clothes, sections of the society derided her with insults such as manhoos, meaning wretched.   Having decided to fight back, Nirmal joined an NGO called Social Upliftment through Rural Action (SUTRA). She underwent training and worked as an accountant for Rs 350 per month. Over the next 15 years, she learned auditing, tallying, accounting, and more.

Recalling her journey during those days, Nirmal said: “People were curious about me. Knowledge of my work quickly spread in my tiny village. Several widows began approaching me to discuss their concerns. Their circumstances were even worse than mine. Their children were left hungry. While she felt a strong urge to help them, Nirmal’s parents, embarrassed by her newfound independence, provided her a Rs 500 monthly allowance but told her to quit her job.

In 2005, SUTRA invited her to Rajasthan to attend a widows’ convention and march to the Chief Minister’s residence to demand rights for single women. It was an eye-opener for Nirmal, who had never travelled beyond Himachal Pradesh. Dressed in a beige sari, she was startled to see some women sporting bright outfits and even jewellery. As she stood among women, some of whom shared experiences similar to hers, she felt a surge of confidence and the need to be unapologetic about her situation in life. Around 120 widows from many districts, including Lahaul and Spiti, showed up. Wearing bidis and sindoor, they joined a quiet protest that saw them  erase  years  of  patriarchy with a single, momentous gesture.

Women’s gatherings and awareness courses began to be held on a monthly basis on issues such as educating women how to file FIRs, creation of self- help groups to start small units and how to speak up in panchayat meetings. A WhatsApp group was formed to post job openings and every year since 2005, more than 150 women have been able to find work.

Nirmal established the Ekal Nari Shakti  Sangathan (ENSS), which works to improve the lives of widows, single, divorced, and abandoned women. Over the years, she says, she and her organization have helped around 16,000 widows find work and freedom. In its rallies, workshops and awareness sessions, ENSS replaced the word vidhwa with ekal mahila (single woman). Nirmal and her team devised a 25-point plan that included demands for land, money, jobs, election seats, pensions, and other benefits. In 2008, about 3,500 women marched on foot from Dhammi to the Chief Minister’s residence in Shimla to highlight their cause.

Financial aid for the education of children of destitute and unmarried mothers was enhanced from Rs 500 to Rs 6,000 under the Mother Teresa Asahaya Matri Sambal Yojana. While Nirmal and ENSS continue to face opposition for challenging traditions, she marches on. Her next mission is that of offering land rights to single women. Fuelling her is the strong belief that if she stood up courageously against her kin at her brother’s wedding when she was 30, nothing can now keep her down at 56.

Source: Himalayan News Chronicle